I wannas sexs uuuuu
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
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