So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
