I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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