Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
