There is no way he is gay with that hair.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
