His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize