What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
