it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I have tasted many bathrooms
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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