Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
