I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
