READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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