Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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