He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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