Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
