Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
