When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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