If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize