So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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