Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
MIDGETS
????
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
