The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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