All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
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