So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
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