Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
