I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Who wears a wallet chain?!
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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