Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
