so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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