Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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