yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
