i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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