I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
There r osticjed everywhere
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
