it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
We're too hungover to prance.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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