i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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