So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
whose parrot is this?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Randomize
