PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
