My balls are so social today.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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