i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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