in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
