trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Randomize
