i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
