You work out of a Hotel?
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Shame - the story of my life.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
