Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize