Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Randomize
