your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
