shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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