so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
