i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
