thus making me awesome and them whores
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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