you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I want to fling myself into the sun
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize