I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
