Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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