I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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